Late last night
as I lay in my bed between going to sleep and being asleep, I allowed myself to
think of life.
I am already past
that most basic of human needs of food, water and shelter. Past the survival
stage, past the procreation stage and even past the stage where I am a mature
adult…for I am now past 60…more an ageing adult past my mid life crisis and
deep into my last main stage of life.
Physical decline
has already set in and I am already preparing myself for inevitably more
decline and perhaps, looking at my wife who has dementia, maybe dependency on
others as ageing sets in with a vengeance.
I do not deny
these realities but accept them with good grace for I am fortunate that with
old age, I have also gained some wisdom….not too much of it but enough to know
that as in all things in life, I must strike a balance between what I want to
do and what I can do. A balance between finding out the meaning of life and the
acceptance of the inevitability of coming death.
I let my mind
wander amongst all these thoughts with contentment because I am now at peace
with who I have become – someone who was born into this earth 67 years and
since then had lived my life as I choose to do and where I choose to live it
and in the process now finds myself in a part of the world – Melbourne – where
all that I had wanted of myself and for myself are blissfully provided
for…..the physical nearness of those people that matters to me and the
financial means to keep body and soul together….all in all a good place to be
when you are deep into the last main stage of life.
How many of you
can have claim to the same things? Not millions in the bank for sure…not even
thousands. No property or personal possessions of any note bar those that I
need but certainly enough to get by and most rewarding of all…the ability to
accept that this is my lot and be content with it. Ahhh life…I wonder what
tomorrow will bring! I wish upon you all the same contentment and grace that a
decent marriage to a good spouse can bring to any one...as it has done to me. Amen.
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