We
are all the sum of our values -
ethnicity, language, culture and our history. What we know of these values we
learn from our upbringing and all the knowledge and learning we acquire through
formal education and informally through various phases of our lives. What you
are taught and how you are taught will determine how you will see your place
within Malaysian or wherever you choose to reside, how you will forge your
identity and where your loyalty
lies.
Now
having said all that, what happens if you have a mind of your own? That in
spite being born a Muslim, Christian, Hindu or Buddhist you chose to be something else? That despite growing up and living in one country you choose to live
in another? And notwithstanding all that you have known and experienced in life
you choose to turn your back on everything that you have known to live life as
you want?
Does
that not throw to the winds all the sum of the values that you have known in
your life? Why would you want to do such a thing? You must either be someone
who is supremely confident of what you want for yourself or you are a complete
moron who knows not what trials and tribulations awaits someone who chooses to
tread the road less traveled.
The
truth lies somewhere in between. Between confidence and moronic. Between the
end of a life elsewhere and the beginning of another somewhere else.
I
am one of those who choose to do this very thing many times. If I think back to
the circumstances and reasons for each coming and going it all becomes a blur.
The only constant is my Family. Without them I am nothing. With them whatever I
do, where ever I am and however dire the circumstances I know I cannot fail. I
have rid myself of everything that others hold sacred and dear to themselves
and yet today I want for nothing that I do not have.
And
still I do not know the meaning of life. Still I do not know how we have
evolved to be what we are. Still I do not know what the future holds. These
things I do not need nor want to know. They have no bearing on my life now and
in what time I have left to live.
Maybe
I am too shallow to understand what is beyond the physical circumstances that
surrounds me. I think it would take deep and considerable thoughts for anyone
to delve into and understand the spiritual and mystical circumstances of our existence.
I do not have the patience or the inclination to go there. Suffice for me that
I exist….and having exist I go on with my life. And then I die. That is all
there is in life. In between birth and death you live life as you think fit.
Mr. Hussein, you sound a very philosophical man who has done some serious inner thinking to be able to thread the path you have taken.Non regrette (Non, je ne regrette rien-the beautiful song by Edith Piah?)Reading your writings, it appears that you do not need or want anything more than necessary. I think you have inner peace within you.That is happiness. Like your writings and your thoughts on life in general. Keep you and wife keep healthy and well.
ReplyDeleteJinosan I tend to look at things as they are without the need to worry about what and how people will react when I do the things I do. There is nothing much out there that has any bearing with what happens in my life and by the same token I too have no bearing in theirs - and this is possible because I want it to be so....and the Little Sparrow singing "No Regrets" does move me to the core - what a tortured life she led and yet sang so beautifully! reagrds
ReplyDeleteMr.Hussein, at your age now you can afford to do what you like as like you say it has no bearings both ways. But I reckon it must have been trying during your adolescent teenage days when family and relative pressures especially in your previous beloved more conservative homeland. Wishes for a healthy life for you and wife. Regards.
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