Three o'clock Tuesday morning. It is so quiet that I can hear my IBook hum as it works uncomplainingly at this time of the morning. Nothing stirs in my apartment or outside on the streets of Fitzroy. I can hear myself think but a piece I am trying to write about how the division within our country is tearing apart everything that we all call our own, has stalled. I have about two pages of notes and ideas of what I want to write about but my mind simply cannot get around to sorting them out in a lucid and rational manner to make it into something I would want to post onto my blog. I know that for now- at this time of the morning - I may be too tired to do so...and so I stop trying.
I am tired but I do not yet want to go to sleep....and yet I am too tired to think. I am in that limbo when you wish for restful sleep and yet know that sleep will not come until your mind gets as tired as your physical self. And so I let my mind wander.
I ask myself why I do not go back to KL to live the rest of my live out?
In the past after a few years away from KL I know that my heart begins to stir with thoughts of going home - for KL was once home to me. It has been almost eight years away and nothing stirs in my heart. Nothing stirs within me because my last link with KL - my Father - is no more and without him nothing draws me back to KL. I did go back once after he passed away and stayed long enough to know for myself that I could leave KL without wanting to go back - time has now told me that I was right to think so. Now Melbourne is home and everything is here for me.
Much to my surprise, the horrendous weather agrees with me. Today the morning was cool and by noon the Sun came out and for a moment all was sunny and warm. By early evening the rain drizzled in and by nightfall it was winter all over again. I had dinner lying on the couch with a blanket to keep me warm. How cool is that? Autumn, Summer, Spring and then Winter all in one day! And now at 3.36 am it s just cool enough to keep me awake without the need for a coffee but if it gets any cooler - the warm bed beckons.
That is Melbourne for you - certainly a far cry from the Gold Coast where the weather is "Beautiful one day.Perfect the Next"...so they say.
And now I must to sleep.