LOMEO & JURIET

With thanks to Antares: Good one Bro!

LOMEO & JURIET (Act II, Scene 2) ~ Terangslated from the Shakespeare into Proper Manglish by Antares

The Story So Far

There has been little peace in the new township of Jinjang Utara ever since the long-drawn and gruesome War of the Seafood Palaces caused a serious rift between two influential clans – the Ngs and the Chans. At a lavish Chap Goh Meh party hosted by Datuk Chan, trouble brews when a bunch of rowdies from the Ng clan decide to gatecrash and are immediately spotted. Not wishing to ruin the festivities, Datuk Chan orders his hotheaded nephew and his gang to ignore the intruders. And so, while the rest of the guests are merrily lambadaing the night away, Lomeo Ng (youngest son of Towkay Ng) encounters the lovely Juriet Chan (favorite daughter of Datuk Chan) and Fate (or Biochemistry and/or Electromagnetism) takes over. They fall desperately (or rise ecstatically) in love; and after the party Lomeo finds himself drawn to the luxurious Chan Villa where, as our hero lurks libidinously in the shadows, he sees the moonstruck Juriet on her second floor balcony, sighing and calling for her true love…

    Shakespearean                                                     Manglish

JUL:  O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name; or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I'll no longer be a Capulet.	JUR:  Aiya Lomeo, Lomeo! Where are you ah, Lomeo? Donkair your farder lah, simply chain your name olidi can; udderwise ah, you plomise to love me orways and I will tlade in my surname Chan.
ROM:  [Aside] Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this?	LOM: [Aside] Watudu ah, keep quiet and rissen summore, or say hurro to her now?
JUL: 'Tis but thy name that is my enemy: thou art thyself, though not a Montague. What's Montague? It is nor hand, nor foot, nor arm, nor face, nor any other part belonging to a man. O, be some other name. What's in a name? That which we call a rose  by any other name would smell as sweet; so Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd, retain that dear perfection which he owes without that title. Romeo, doff thy name, and for that name, which is no part of thee, take all myself.	JUR: Your name oni got ploblem one; you yourself okay, so what your family name called Ng. Arfter all, what is Ng? Not your finger, or your foot, or your nose, or your toes, or any udder part of you called Ng wat. Aiya, why notchew call yourself some udder name? Name is name oni wat. Loh’s frower we call sumting else steel smelling nice wat; so Lomeo oso nice, sahpose he not called Lomeo Ng, evelyting about him ngam-ngam oni. Lomeo, cancer your name lah; your name not rike gum to your body wat. Give up the Ng and take me lah.
ROM: I take thee at thy word. Call me but love, and I'll be new baptis'd; henceforth I never will be Romeo.	LOM: Orait lah, I take , I take! You oni have to call me sayang, and olidi I got new name; Lomeo Ng habis!
JUL: What man art thou that, thus bescreened in night, so stumblest on my counsel?	JUR: Alamak! Got olang minyak or wat? Who de hell are you ah, and why you spy on me one?
ROM: By a name I know not how to tell thee who I am: my name, dear saint, is hateful to myself, because it is an enemy to thee. Had I it written, I would tear the word.	LOM: My name I skad to tell you, bekos now I oso hate my name: arfturds you ting I am your anneemee, dear moon goddess. Sahpose my name wlite on piece of paper, better I tear it up.
JUL: My ears have yet not drunk a hundred words of thy tongue's uttering, yet I know the sound. Art thou not Romeo, and a Montague?	JUR: Oni a few words flom your mouf enter my ear, but olidi I know your voice: you are Lomeo, your farder Towkay Ng, istlu ornot?
ROM: Neither, fair saint, if either thee dislike.	LOM: Not tlue, cantik, if you doan rike my farder name or mais one.
JUL:  How cam'st thou hither, tell me, and wherefore? The orchard walls are high and hard to climb, and the place death, considering who thou art, if any of my kinsmen find thee here.	JUR: How you kum here and waffor, yutelme? Got high-high wall outside, summore bubwire and 24-hour sikhulity; dailah, sahpose my family catch you.
ROM: With love's light wings did I o'erperch these walls, for stony limits cannot hold love out, and what love can do, that dares love attempt: therefore thy kinsmen are no stop to me.	LOM: My hut feeling so right one, can fry olidi; so hauken stonewall stop me? Bekos of love lah I bekum helo, and helo kennot die one.
JUL:  If they do see thee, they will murder thee.	JUR: Aiyo, eef my brudders see you ah, dey weel hantam you kau-kau.
ROM: Alack, there lies more peril in thine eye than twenty of their swords. Look thou but sweet and I am proof against their enmity.	LOM: Adoi, your rooks arone enuf to kill, no nid twenty palangs and bearing sclaper; you rook so sweet, hauken anyone fill beetter?
JUL:  I would not for the world they saw thee here.	JUR: Better dey doan see you here, udderwise mampus lah.
ROM: I have night's cloak to hide me from their eyes, and, but thou love me, let them find me here; my life were better ended by their hate than death prorogued, wanting of thy love.	LOM: So dark one, how dey can see me? And eef you doan love me, better dey catch me; better to die flom their hate dan leeve widout your love.
JUL:  By whose direction found'st thou out this place?	JUR: Who show you de way here?
ROM: By love, that first did prompt me to enquire. He lent me counsel, and I lent him eyes. I am no pilot, yet, wert thou as far as that vast shore wash'd with the furthest sea, I should adventure for such merchandise.	LOM: Love lah, love orways find a way, izzenit? I kennot dlive Ploton or sail boat or fry aeloplane, but even eef you leeve overseas, steel I weel find you; how far oso nevermain, I doan brarf you.
JUL:  Thou knowest the mask of night is on my face, else would a maiden blush bepaint my cheek for that which thou hast heard me speak tonight. Fain would I dwell on form; fain, fain deny what I have spoke. But farewell compliment. Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say 'Ay', and I will take thy word. Yet, if thou swear'st,\ thou mayst prove false. At lovers' perjuries, they say, Jove laughs. O gentle Romeo, if thou dost love, pronounce it faithfully: or if thou thinkest I am too quickly won, I'll frown, and be perverse, and say thee nay, so thou wilt woo: but else, not for the world. In truth, fair Montague, I am too fond; and therefore thou mayst think my 'haviour light: but trust me, gentleman, I'll prove more true than those that have more cunning to be strange. I should have been more strange, I must confess, but that thou overheard'st, ere I was 'ware, my true-love passion: therefore pardon me; and not impute this yielding to light love which the dark night hath so discovered.	JUR: Lucky tonight vely dark, so you kennot see my chik turn led-led one olidi. Aiya, shy oni lah wat you hear me spik just now! But wat I said you olidi hear, so nemmain lah; no nid to pletend anymore, too rate to save face. You love me ornot? Sure lah, you say yes; can sumpah summore, but mebbe tipu oni. The God oso he orways raughing at peeple’s plomises of love. Aiya Lomeo, tell me tluly one lah: you love me ornot? Sahpose yuting I am too easy to get? Mebbe I better talik harga and say dowan! Den you weel chase a bit lah; but I oso dowan to lun too fast. Ackchwurly, my dear Mr Ng, I feel vely geli lah: plis doan ting I am phooling alaun wid you, I am vely stletford one, my hut kennot chit people one, not rike dose womans wid swit-swit tongues. Mebbe sum people weel say I am too flenly to you, a stlanger summore, but olidi you heard me saying all kind of tings, so nemmain lah. Solly ah, I kennot acting one: I give myself to you, even doh I kennot see you one, so gelap tonight.
ROM: Lady, by yonder blessed moon I vow, that tips with silver all these fruit-tree tops…	LOM: Chah Bor, I sumpah by the silver moon which makes all de tlees in your garden shiny…
JUL: O, swear not by the moon, the inconstant moon, that monthly changes in her circled orb, lest that thy love prove likewise variable.	JUR: Cheh, doan sumpah by the moon, he not vely steady one, evely week chain size and shape. Arfturds your love rike dat oso, den how?
ROM: What shall I swear by?	LOM: Den how to swear?
JUL: Do not swear at all. Or if thou wilt, swear by thy gracious self, which is the god of my idolatry, and I'll believe thee.	JUR: Better not to swear at all; or else you sumpah on your own hut, which is the awltar where I can pray; like dat I can belif lah.
ROM: If my heart's dear love...	LOM: Sahpose my hut pumping too hard…
JUL: Well, do not swear: although I joy in thee, I have no joy of this contract to-night: it is too rash, too unadvised, too sudden; too like the lightning, which doth cease to be ere one can say 'It lightens.' Sweet, good night! This bud of love, by summer's ripening breath, may prove a beauteous flower when next we meet. Good night, good night! as sweet repose and rest come to thy heart as that within my breast!	JUR: Aiyah, den doan swear lah. I am vely happy to see you, but not so happy to see you rike dis: hauken so fast, so culi-culi one, rike rightning which doan last more dan a few seckands. Let us meet again later lah, and see eef dis tender fluit of love is masak ornot. Now our lomance rike frower bud oni, not open foolly yet. So I say goonight; go home and sreep first, okay?
ROM: O, wilt thou leave me so unsatisfied?	LOM: Aiyo, I nochet satisfied.
JUL: What satisfaction canst thou have tonight?	JUR: How you wan me to satisfy you?
ROM: The exchange of thy love's faithful vow for mine.	LOM: I wan to hear you sumpah your love for me.
JUL: I gave thee mine before thou didst request it: and yet I would it were to give again.	JUR: Podah, oridi swear wat, even before you arsk. But you wan, I can swear again, no ploblem. I take back my plomise.
ROM: Wouldst thou withdraw it? for what purpose, love?	LOM: Oi, doan take back lah; waffor you take back?
JUL: But to be frank, and give it thee again. And yet I wish but for the thing I have: my bounty is as boundless as the sea, my love as deep; the more I give to thee, the more I have, for both are infinite. [Nurse calls within] I hear some noise within; dear love, adieu! Anon, good nurse! Sweet Montague, be true. Stay but a little, I will come again. [Exit]	JUR: So I can geeve you again lah, bodoh. But you got olidi wat. Arfterall I filling open rike the sea, and my love vely deep one you know: I geeve and geeve you, steel kennot habis, just rike sea orways got water one. [Amah calls from inside] Someone bising olidi. Okay lah, sayang, goodbye! - Ah Soh, why you shouting? – Mr Ng, manis, you wait reetle while ah, I come out again. [Exit]
ROM: O blessed, blessed night! I am afeard. Being in night, all this is but a dream, too flattering-sweet to be substantial.	LOM: Wah, shiok oni lah! Hope I am not dleaming oni; why I so rucky bugger one?
[Re-enter JULIET, above] JUL: Three words, dear Romeo, and good night indeed. If that thy bent of love be honourable, thy purpose marriage, send me word tomorrow, by one that I'll procure to come to thee, where and what time thou wilt perform the rite; and all my fortunes at thy foot I'll lay and follow thee my lord throughout the world. NURSE [Within]: Madam! JUL:  I come, anon. -- But if thou mean'st not well, I do beseech thee -- NURSE [Within]: Madam! JUL: By and by, I come: -- To cease thy suit, and leave me to my grief: to-morrow will I send.	[Re-enter JURIET on 3rd floor of Chan Villa] JUR: Tlee words more, Lomeo sayang, or mebbe tlee hundled; den distaim really goonight oridi. Eef you love me enuf to marry me ah, tomollow you must pass me message  showing orspeeshus date and which lestoran we can have beeg dinner; and my holaif I weel put infrun of you lah, and all alaun de world I weel forrow you. AMAH [Within]: Meees! JUR: Kahming, kahming – But eef you are not really selious one, aitelyu – AMAH [Within]: Meees Juriiiiet! JUR: Okay, okay lah! – stop praying dis game and let me suffer hut pain by myself. Tomollow I contact you ah.
ROM: So thrive my soul --	LOM: Hweeyoh, my hut so happy can die one --
JUL: A thousand times good night! [Exit, above]	JUR: Goonight, goonight, lepeat one tausend taims goonight! [Closing 3rd floor window]
ROM: A thousand times the worse, to want thy light. Love goes toward love, as schoolboys from their books, but love from love, toward school with heavy looks.	LOM: One tausend taims more susah to see you go away. Love ah, going near love orways rike rong weekend coming up; but when love reaving love ah, just rike must go for extla tuition.

                                                 

Antares © 1995-2012

Antares now heads the Department of Advanced Manglish at the University of Pertak. He has initiated a RM35 million program to "terangslate" the World's Great Books into Manglish - which has yet to be formally acknowledged as Malaysia's de facto national language, even though many have actively campaigned for this since 1989. 

The infamous balcony scene in Manglish from Lomeo & Juriet has twice beenstaged in Kuala Lumpur. It also inspired a full-scale Malaysian adaptation in 2005 by Gavin Yap, titled Romi & Joo Lee (dan lain-lain). 

Thanks to Sheryll Stodhart (glowingly described by an Umno rightwing dickhead as a "diehard socialist, Anwar Ibrahim apologist, and rabid anti-government writer") and Men's Review for being the first to publish my Manglish-Lit series in 1995.

SHAKESPEARE'S JULIUS CAESAR ala MANGLISH!

steadyaku47 comment: This is indeed a work of epic proportions by Antares. Well done Bro! 

With thanks to Antares :

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 5, 2012

THE BARD IN MANGLISH ~ Julius Caesar (Act I, Scene 2)

Who said kennot? You orways tink defler Shakespeare wankain hard to understand, so waffor you bodder to read de bladibarger? No ploblem lah – now oridi terangslated into Proper Manglish, so seemple oni. Got no space to print de hole ting, eggcerpt enough lah. Dis one from Julius Caesar. Vely famous one dis play  - got murder, got politics, but sorry lah, no sex (becos in Italy ah, got Mona Lisa but no Mona Fandey, remember her ornot, Rosmah’s infamous step-aunty?) Wen people see you reading dis dey weel tink you got cowture wan. Orait man!

Shakespearean                            Manglish

Caesar: Let me have men about me that are fat; sleek-headed men, and such as sleep o’ nights. Yond Cassius has a lean and hungry look; he thinks too much. Such men are dangerous.	Caesar: Aiseh betayuall fatty bom-bom makan all de taim one; Brylcreem your hair lah, and at night sleeping like a pig oni. Defler Cassius orways looking so skeeny like one year never eat; orways tinking too much. Aitelyu ah, dis kain of fler helluva dangerous.
Antony: Fear him not, Caesar, he’s not dangerous; he is a noble Roman, and well given.	Antony: Aiyah, Caesar, no nid to skad him one, hauken defler dangerous? He got class one, orways spik nicely and wearing stylo one.
Caesar: Would he were fatter! But I fear him not, Yet if my name were liable to fear, I do not know the man I should avoid so soon as that spare Cassius. He reads much. He is a great observer, and he looks quite through the deeds of men. He loves no plays, as thou dost, Antony; he hears no music, seldom he smiles, and as if he mock’d himself, and scorn’d his spirit that could be mov’d to smile at anything. Such men as he be never at heart’s ease whiles they behold a greater than themselves, and therefore they are evry dangerous. I rather tell thee what is to be fear’d than what I fear; for always I am Caesar. Come on my right hand, for this ear is deaf, and tell me truly what thou think’st of him.	Caesar: I oni weesh we can call him fatso! But ackchwurly I not skad him. Say oni lah, sahposing I am a takut fler, I woon go near dat bamboo-stick Cassius. Orways reading book, see everyting wankain oni, aitelyu nobody can blarf de bladibarger one. Never fool araun, not like you lah, Antony; he never lissen music. Seldom oni smailing, and wen he smail, like buaya oni, tweested lah, I tink maybe defler doan like himself or wat, as if oni stoopid ijiot like to smail one. Flers like dat ah, kennot relak one – until dey bekum Nombor Satu. Dat’s why aiseh very dangerous. Oni telling you why you must wochaut lah – not to say I am skad of any barger; hauken Caesar skad, I arsk you? Eh, you come over here, my left ear got lobang kennot hear properly. Den you tell me frankly spikking wat yuting of defler.
[Sennet. Exeunt Caesar & his Train.] Casca: You pulled me by the cloak. Would you speak with me?	[Kompang. Caesar & his Member semua keluar.] Casca: Why you catch my sarong? You wan to tok, tok lah, doan pull my baju ok?
Brutus: Ay, Casca; tell me what hath chanc’d today, that Caesar looks so sad	Brutus: Ya, Casca; wat happen just now ah, why Caesar looking wankain teruk oni?
Casca: Why, you were with him, were you not?	Casca: I thot you saw oso wat, waffor you arsk me?
Brutus: I should not then ask Casca what had chanc’d.	Brutus: No, man, dat’s why arsking you.
Casca: Why, there was a crown offer’d him; and being offer’d him, he put it by with the back of his hand, thus; and then the people fell a-shouting.	Casca: Aiyah, people gif him chan to wear de Agong’s hat, but defler push away with his hand, like dis; and den de people bising lah.
Brutus: What was the second noise for?	Brutus: Seckand taim why dey shout?
Casca: Why, for that too.	Casca: Same ting lah.
Cassius: They shouted thrice; what was the last cry for?	Cassius: Shouting tree taims wat, I hear; so wat happen ah?
Casca: Why, for that too.	Casca: Same story lah, yutingwat.
Brutus: Was the crown offer’d him thrice?	Brutus: Wah, tree taims ah, dey awfer him Agong’s hat?
Casca: Ay, marry, was’t, and he put it by thrice, every time gentler than other; and at every putting by mine honest neighbours shouted.	Casca: Yala, no joke,  man; and defler say dowan tree taims, everytaim more slowly lah, tarik harga lah; and ofcoslah everytaim he do like dat, our rakyat setia bising oni.
Cassius: Who offer’d him the crown?	Cassius: Who awfer him de Agong’s hat?
Casca: Why, Antony.	Casca: Who else, Antony lah.
Brutus: Tell us the manner of it, gentle Casca.	Brutus: Plis gif us blow-by-blow akaun, saudara Casca.
Casca: I can as well be hang’d as tell the manner of it; it was mere foolery; I did not mark it. I saw Mark Antony offer him a crown – yet ‘twas not a crown neither, ‘twas one of these coronets – and, as I told you, he put it by once; but for all that, to my thinking, he would fain have had it. Then he offer’d it to him again; then he put it by again; but to my thinking, he was very loath to lay his fingers off it. And then he offer’d it the third time; he put it the third time by; and still as he refus’d it, the rabblement hooted, and clapp’d their chopt hands, and threw up their sweaty night-caps, and uttered such a deal of stinking breath because Caesar refus’d the crown, that it almost choked Caesar; for he swooned and fell down at it.  And for mine own part I durst not laugh, for fear of opening my lips and receiving the bad air.	Casca: Aiyah, wasting taim oni, all for show one lah, yuting I doan know ah. Dat barger Mark Antony gif him see de Agong’s hat –ackchwurly not the real ting lah, fancy baseball cap oni – and like aiseh, first taim he push aside lah; but look like secretly ah, defler wannit lah. Den again he awfer him; den again he push aside; but frankly spikking ah, defler dam reluktan to let go, man. And den de turd taim he awfer; and still de barger refuse. So de stoopid rakyat start bellowing like kerbau, and clapping like bladifools lah, and dey all chuck their smelly songkoks in the air, and bising like baboon kena belacan until Caesar awmos kennot stand; defler pengsan, man, and fall down lah.  I myself ah, I dare not to open my maut and laugh oso – arfturds I kena sial punya angin.
Cassius: But soft, I pray you. What, did Caesar swoon?	Cassius: Alamak, you min de barsket Caesar pengsan ah?
Casca: He fell down in the market-place, and foam’d at mouth, and was speechless.	Casca: He collapse infrun of KLSE, boy, his maut got white-white ting coming out, and kennot spik oridi.
Brutus: ‘Tis very like. He hath the falling sickness.	Brutus: I am not surprais lah. Defler got weak heart wat.
Cassius: No, Caesar hath it not; but you, and I, and honest Casca, we have the falling sickness.	Cassius: Aitelyu frankly one, not Caesar lah; but I, and you, and our goodfren Casca, we are de bladibargers who got weak hearts.
Casca: I know not what you mean by that, but I am sure Caesar fell down. If the rag-tag people did not clap him and hiss him, according as he pleas’d and displeas’d them, as they use to do the players in the theatre, I am no true man.	Casca: Doan tokkok lah, I doan booshit you, aitelyu Caesar conked out, boy. Aiyo, dose bladi peasants tink it’s all wayang kulit show, cheering and booing like chewren see cartoon oni, you doan belif me you can tell me to go and fark spaider.

Antares © 1995-2012

Et tu, Brute? Then fall, Caesar! | Pukimamak! Mukhriz dan Muh.... mampuslah!

Ten questions you should never ask in a job interview

October 4, 2012, 11:26 am Forbes.com Yahoo!7

The top ten most common interview questions to scratch off our lists immediately–plus five effective ones to ask instead.

“So, do you have any questions for me?”

This common refrain toward the close of a job interview can make even the best of us stammer when the tables are turned. But with the national unemployment rate over 8%, sharp interview skills are more important than ever.

Whether or not you’re currently looking for a job, try your knowledge: Do you have the right questions to ask your interviewer?

Photos: Some of the world's most creative and unique resumes

The goal, of course, is to ask a few smart questions – thoughtful ones that show you’ve been paying attention and have done your homework when it comes to researching the company, and the specific job you’re after. At the very least, you want to ask something.

Most employers agree that, “No, I have no questions,” is the worst possible response. “The most frustrating thing for a recruiter is when you don’t have any questions at all,” says recruiter Abby Kohut of AbsolutelyAbby.com.

We asked professional recruiters to brief us on the top ten most common interview questions to scratch off our lists immediately–plus five effective ones to ask instead.

Questions You Should Never Ask in a Job Interview

1. Anything related to salary or benefits

“Company benefits [and salary negotiations] don’t come into play until an offer has been extended,” says Kohut. The same principle applies to sick time and vacation days. It’s best to avoid any question that sounds like you assume you already have the position–unless, of course, your interviewer brings it up first.

Photos: Toughest job interview questions answered

2. Questions that start with “why?”

Why? It’s a matter of psychology. These kinds of questions put people on the defensive, says Kohut. She advises repositioning a question such as, “Why did the company lay off people last year?” to a less confrontational, “I read about the layoffs you had. What’s your opinion on how the company is positioned for the future?”

3. “Who is your competition?”

This is a great example of a question that could either make you sound thoughtful … or totally backfire and reveal that you did zero research about the company prior to the interview, says Jacqui Barrett-Poindexter of CareerTrend.net. Before asking any question, determine whether it’s something you could have figured out yourself through a Google search. If it is, a) don’t ask it and b) do that Google search before your interview!

Related: What recruiters wish job seekers knew

4. “How often do reviews occur?”

Maybe you’re concerned about the company’s view of your performance, or maybe you’re just curious, but nix any questions about the company’s review or self-appraisal policies. “It makes us think you’re concerned with how often negative feedback might be delivered,” says Kohut. Keep your confidence intact, and avoid the topic altogether–or at least until you receive an offer.

5. “May I arrive early or leave late as long as I get my hours in?”

Even if you make it clear that you’re hoping for a flexible schedule to accommodate a legitimate concern such as picking up your kids from daycare, Barrett-Poindexter advises against this question. “While work-life balance is a very popular concern right now, it’s not the most pressing consideration for a hiring decision-maker,” she says. “Insinuating early on that you’re concerned about balancing your life may indicate to your employer that you are more concerned about your needs and less concerned about the company’s.”

6. “Can I work from home?”

Unless it was implied in the initial job description, don’t bring it up. “Some companies will allow you to work from home on occasion once they see what a productive employee you are,” says Kohut. But an interview isn’t the time to be asking for special favors. Right now your top priority is selling them on you first.

Photos: Things to do at the end of each work day

7. “Would you like to see my references?”

“Interviewing is a lot like dating,” says Barrett-Poindexter. “It’s important to entice with your value and attract them to call you for the next ‘date’.” Offering up your references too soon may hint at desperation. Plus, you don’t want to run the risk of overusing your references.

8. How soon do you promote employees?

“An individual asking this question may come off as arrogant and entitled,” says recruiter Josh Tolan of SparkHire.com.

9. Will I get my own office?

This is an uncomfortable one, says Tolan. Of course you may wonder about it, but will something like this really play into whether you accept a career opportunity or not? If so, he says, it may be time to rethink your priorities.

10. Will you monitor my social networking profiles?

While a valid concern in today’s culture, this is something best left unsaid. “It gives the impression you have something to hide,” says Tolan. Play it safe and don’t post anything (especially disparaging things) about your company, co-workers or employers on Facebook, Twitter–or anywhere on the internet, really.
… Yes, even if you’re not “friends” with anyone at work. These kinds of things have a way of getting around.

Questions You Should Definitely Ask in a Job Interview

1. Can you explain the culture to me, with examples of how the company upholds it?

Asking for specific insight into the company’s culture is key. “Everyone will tell you that their culture is great, but examples prove it,” says Abby Kohut. This will help you decide if you want to work for them. At the same time, most interviewers are also trying to assess if you’re a good cultural fit for the company.

Get ahead in your career - all the tips and tricks

2. How have you recognised your employees in the past?

This is another example of a smart question that digs for specifics. “You want to be sure that your new company appreciates its employees,” says Kohut, and that the company values morale.

3. What excites you most about your job, and what do you like most about this company?

By nature, most people like to talk about themselves, so this question helps warm up your interviewer, suggests Barrett-Poindexter. It also provides critical insight into whether you’d be happy working with this individual or company. “If your interviewer’s answer excites you, that can further reinforce your decision to continue the interview process. If the response is lukewarm, it may give you something to think about before deciding to invest in a future here.”

4. I like to collaborate with team members and brainstorm ideas to help reach communal goals. Can you give me examples of collaboration within the company?

“This is a great question for team players,” says Josh Tolan. It not only shows that you have a quality that’s very valuable to the company, but it also gets down to brass tacks when it comes to company culture.

5. What are the most important things you’d like to see me accomplish in the first 30, 60 and 90 days of my employment?

This question shows you’re in invested in what you can bring to the company, and not just what the company can do for you. “Expect the answer to go deeper than just a basic skill set requirement,” says Jacqui Barrett Poindexter. “Hope that the interviewer will wander a bit, providing personal insight into qualities he favors–perhaps even offering nuggets of detail you can use to reinforce your value in the follow-up thank-you letter.”

Cakap cakap : TIMBALAN PRESIDEN PKR MOHAMED AZMIN ALI BAKAL MENTRI BESAR SELANGOR?

There he goes again! The same Timbalan Presiden PKR Mohamed Azmin Ali having delusions of grandeur making the following prediction/illusion/delusion/(delete what you think is not applicable):  

Azmin: Khalid to get minister’s job if Pakatan takes Putrajaya

 (The Malaysian Insider) - Tan Sri Khalid Ibrahim is likely to be made a Cabinet minister if Pakatan Rakyat (PR) wins the general election, PKR deputy president Azmin Ali has said.

He told Malay daily Sinar Harian that this would mean Khalid would vacate the Selangor mentri besar’s position even if PR retains the state in the next general election.

Khalid with a straight face comments:

“Saya baca kenyataan (Azmin) dari sudut positif dan nampaknya saya boleh bekerja dalam kerajaan Persekutuan dan Negeri,” katanya kepada pemberita selepas mempengerusikan mesyuarat mingguan exco di sini hari ini.

While Setiausaha Agung PAS Datuk Mustafa Ali said:

"Yang kedua hari ini, Timbalan Presiden PKR, Azmin Ali dilaporkan media sebagai berkata, seolah-olah Selangor akan mendapat MB baru.

"Ini juga tidak pernah kita bincangkan dan bakal memberikan implikasi negatif,"

And Setiausaha Politik MB Selangor Faekah Husin made her feelings on the matter plain by saying:

“Siapa Azmin untuk membuat kesimpulan begitu? Saya tidak tahu dari mana dia dapat aspirasi begitu?” kata Faekah.

Now that almost everybody, bar DSAI (for reasons best known to himself!) has had his or her say, allow me to have mine.

I wish Karpal Singh will have his say on this matter in the same way he has been forthright in his comments on issues that trouble him in the past. It amazes me that Karpal Singh, Tony Pua and those people within Pakatan Rakyat who are more than eager to make comments on matters that interest them do not bother to make public comments on what this Azmin says.

There is Azmin waving a placard saying “I WANT TO BE MB OF SELANGOR”outside Pakatan Rakyat’s HQ (wherever that may be!) and everyone walks past him without so much as a slap on his wrist for being a naughty and mischievous boy. Why?

By now every one out there in Bolehland already have an opinion on the matter and are not afraid to let anyone who will listen have an earful of what they think of this Azmin Ali. And what PKR is hoping is that if they keep quiet long enough…it will all go away!

My concern is simply this. If this is the caliber of PKR’s Timbalan Presiden then we have these thoughts to ponder:

1.  If this is the best number two that PKR can offer then there is room to doubt DSAI’s thought process in accepting this person to be his designated heir.

2.  Is it not time that Pakatan Rakayat leadership takes a stand as to whether Azmin is acceptable as PKR Timbalan President because their opinion of Azmin in private is already known. Cakap serupa bikin lah!

3.  Do we have to put the “We want Nurrul as Timbalan Presiden” campaign again into overdrive so near to the general election?

4.  Why has DSAI not just ask Azmin to “Shut up!”.   

Like Berahim Berok this Azmin Ali, by his previous actions, have no place in State Politics or (heaven forbids!) politics at the Federal level. The sooner PKR understand this the better it would be for Pakatan Rakyat.

As I have said before, only Anwar can cause his own downfall. This is one other instance where what he will do to rein in Azmin will be closely monitored by all of us for any signs of weakness on DSAI’s part. Though from past history we know that nothing much will be done by DSAI, PKR or Pakatan Rakyat. And when they chose to do that then it would be fair to say that they would be regarded as being incapable of policing their own ranks.