Saturday 30 May 2015

cakap cakap...The time to decide if my time is better spent working on this blog or in the care of my wife has come.

The time to decide if my time is better spent working on this blog or in the care of my wife has come. I can no longer do justice to doing both at the same time - and there is no question who or what comes first. 

It is now close to midnight and my heart tells me that blogging about current affairs in Malaysia is not the thing to do when I can better spend the time in the care of my wife. You see I have had to pull my hands away from her grasps, get out of bed and go to the desk beside our bed to write this. And as I did that it woke her from her sleep and she is watching me questioningly as to why I had to do that. And I know I do not want to do that anymore than is necessary if I can help it. So that is why I need to tell you all that I intend to do just that. Spend more time with my wife than work on this blog. 

That does not mean that I will stop writing all together. I do not think I can do that as I know there are still many things I want to write about - but it will not be as often as I am used to doing.         

It just occurred to me this evening when I realized that she is increasingly more frail as I watch her eat. It may be her dementia but I know that eating, as is doing any other physical thing, is an effort for her. 

I see and can feel her hand trembling when she reaches out to me for support as I walk her to the bathroom in the mornings. Walking is an effort for her and this I can see in her eyes every time I reach out to take her hand to help her walk. And there is nothing I can do about it but to be there for her to make these things easier for her to do. 

So tonight as we went to sleep together I made the decision to devote more time to her and less time on steadyaku47. I hope you will understand why steadyaku47 will no longer be what it was before - a labor of love for me because my love needs me more than this blog. 

But write I still will as and when I can.

There is just too many things wrong with our political leaders who are in charge of the affairs of our nation for us to keep silent. Until we are rid of these toxic and cancerous blight on the well being of our people, our nation and our future, each of us, in our own way, must do what we can to rid ourselves of them. I will continue to write.     

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