Wednesday 25 March 2009

Looking into ME.

I have no stomach to fight the good fight against social injustices. Against poverty. Take side with the Malays against the Chinese to secure Bumiputra “rights” guaranteed under the “social contract” nor make personal sacrifices for causes that need to be championed for the oppressed. Not for me to spend time under ISA for inciting mob violence against the nation. I will say my two cents worth through my writings and all that takes is a few hours of my time comfortably seated in my favorite green swivel armchair with a cup of green tea while I let my mind wander and let my fingers go tap tap tap on my PC keyboard. Once written I post in onto my Steadyaku” blog and I am done with my work. No more no less.

Before any of you throw any barbs my way understand this. I am what I am because I choose to be so. While I passionately understand the positions the Malays are in, I also understand the frustration the Chinese and other races must feel in not being treated equally in a country they call home. The Chinese are not stupid and neither are the Malays. We all know that for us to respect each other we must treat each other equally. To not do so on grounds of race insults each other no matter what our rationale is.

While I am totally against money politics, I understand the circumstances UMNO leaders are faced with – easy money to be had with minimal effort – I would probably do the same – hell I have done the same in the past! Where the opportunity to make a fast buck was presented to me, I took it. If in the process I had to bend a few rules, drop a few well known names to impress and had to bribe people to get what I want – I did it. I have lived with money and lived without money. It is better to live with money – and many people will do what they have to do to get money – me included.

Power and the trappings of power are sought after by all. I have basked in the company of the powerful and the rich and it is invigorating to be recognized by them and have that situation acknowledged by those around you. To be in a car with motorcycles outriders, flag flying and not stopping for traffic protocol is indeed a “feel good” situation that does feed your ego tremendously – and I have experienced that to. If you are a normal human being – and by that I would take 99.9% of us are normal human beings – these excesses and extravagances are yearned by many but enjoyed only by a few. KJ is living the life that 99.9 % of us dreamed – son in law of the Prime Minister, smart enough to make use of that position to benefit him financially and simultaneously amass power (albeit temporary) from within UMNO – hell if I was in that position I too probably would have delusion of grandeur to be Prime Minister within five years if not sooner.

I am a man of principal but if some of my principals are not acceptable to you, then I have others that might meet with your approval. I am flexible. Always taking the easy way – not for me to stand against the might of the Police, the FRU or the Army. It’s too much pain and suffering to stand and be counted. If pushed I will get into an argument about Police brutality, Police corruption – but I will not hesitate to use all the connections at my disposal to get out of paying a fine for traffic offences – why? Because I can do so and will be stupid not to do so because the Police are a corrupted bunch of people.

Corruption in the Government Departments? I am not above entertaining or paying bribes to these little Napoleons to secure projects or tenders from them. I view these Little Napoleons with contempt and disgust because they accept bribes but curiously I justify my act of giving these bribes as a “cari makan” necessity on my part. Do I feel remorse or guilt in doing so? No ….and I sleep soundly at night too.

Why have I become so? Because I see what is happening around me and I know that corruption, naked greed and pushing their weight around by those who can, are the way things are done in Malaysia. With the Mata Mata you know you will have to kautim – with the Inspectors you are looking at the few hundred ringgit mark and above – but how do you handle the ACP and the SAC’s? Money my friend, money !!! Anything can be done, arranged, “selesai” or “kautim” if you have money or the right connections. The combination of money and the right connections will make you a Norza or a KJ.

If we do not make a stand against these excesses then who will? Not me definitely. If everybody act the way I do will there not be chaos in the world? No there will not be because not everybody will act the way I do. There will always be do gooders who will find themselves duty bound to do “the right’ thing ! And the “Good Guys” will outnumber the “Bad Guys” – so the world will be okay.

How do you handle the PA’s to the KSU’s, the Minister”…nay even the Special Assistants to the PM !!! All these Gate Keepers are a corrupted lot demanding money, to allow us our allotted time with their bosses. Have you tried to go into the PM’s complex at Putrajaya? You cannot even get into the front gate if your name is not on the list. How do you get your name on the list? Knowing Tajuddin is a good start !! I knew Tajuddin when he was with Pak Lah in the Ministry of Foreign Affairs…how he has changed since coming to Putrajaya.

Thank GOD I have left that part of my life behind. Here in Australia you are not required to put your age, sex or religion when applying for a Job – they don’t want to know because you are chosen on your merit. Last week a Federal Judge in Australia was sentenced to a minimum of two years in prison because he lied in trying to escape paying for a speeding ticket that would, at most, cost him a few hundred dollars – and this Federal Judge was designated as a “Living Treasure” for Australia because of his work for the oppressed . Can you imagine a similar situation in Malaysia? I drove around without a license for ten years – and got away with it despite being stopped many times by the Police. No I never bribed the mata mata – I just talked myself out of the situation –though there has been situations where I did have to pay a few fines because I refuse to bribe the mata mata and he refused to be intimidated by me – but in most cases I simply told them off for asking me to “selesai” the matter in the first place and I drive off before they stopped trembling in their boots !! I must have been a very arrogant bastards during in those days !!

The Royalty? Their “used by” expired a few years back. They are a classic example of what “in breeding” can do to your generations to come. We Malays can do without them because of what use are leeches to one who is busy toiling in the Padi fields? They are incapable of leadership. They are the designated head of Religion in each state – but their personal life tells us to “Do as I say not do as I do”. Take the Sultan of Selangor – does he think that the Rakyat are oblivious of his “arrangements” - which is why getting a wife is not at the top of his priorities for now. The Sultan of Pahang is way ahead of the other Sultans in his shenanigans and it would be best to not even begin to chronicle them as it would not only bring shame to the Malays but to our country. Thank God for the changing of the Guard in Negri Sembilan.

I can go on and on and on but to what purpose? Now this is the part that makes me wonder. All that I have said above is known to our Political Leaders. And nothing is done? Why? Complicity by all requires duplicity by all to ensure that the status quo is maintained even when they know it is wrong.

For now I need only to read about these unpleasantness from the Internet and the Blogs that I read – and then only if I choose to read them. I no longer have to deal with these things when I am stopped by the Police, when I go to the Government departments to get anything done, nor do I have to hear about the going on of these so called leaders of our nations – here I am insulated from these excesses and it is a different way of life that I am fortunate enough to be able to choose to live in.

But what are my problems compared to what others had to endure. Consider this statement by an Afghan Refugee who arrived in Australia a few years back. “I left my wife, my son and two daughters. My two daughters died because they were sick”…in that short sentence he describe a life that I could never even begin to imagine. To leave your wife, to leave your son and to not see your two daughters again….GOD so much sadness for one man ?

Then there was this statement from a Child Soldier somewhere in Africa. “They came into the house. They had long knives. My Mother and Father were slashed in the face and had their arms and legs cut off. My sister was lifted up and had her head bashed on the floor. I was asked to follow them outside and they asked me to join the army. I was a soldier for four years” – in that short paragraph he dismissed his four years of hell - and yet when you looked at him, he is accepting of what has happened in his life and now alone in the world he can still smile and thank Australia for allowing in him as a Refugee.

I no longer ask “If there is a GOD why must he allow so much suffering?”. I am stoic in my belief that there is a GOD but what he has done is to put this world into being. Then he said “Go Forth and Multiply” – and wiped his hands clean of us after that for he was wise enough to know that NOBODY can even begin to understand what Man is capable of. What atrocities he can commit. Certainly GOD wanted no part of it but MAN in his infinite wisdom knew that when all is lost to reason, there must be something or somebody they can fall back on. Something or Someone they can use to explain what the mind cannot comprehend. That is GOD. I cannot comprehend that there is a Heaven or a Hell. I cannot comprehend the need to have values imposed upon us because I can think for myself what is Good and Bad – I do not need to be ask to do good with the promise that if I do good then I will go to heaven. For me I get turn off at the “you can have up to four wives” bit…no matter what the conditions are to have the four wives. Because whatever the conditions are the fundamental of allowing a MAN to have four wives IS WRONG. You cannot make it right by imposing conditions to it.

I see my Heroes as those people that will risk their life to save others…the Doctors who can and do save lives, the aid workers who go into war torn countries to assist the poor and the hungry. The soldiers who fought in Viet Nam, be it the Vietcong or the Americans, must be brave people – although most were there because they had to. I have grudging respect for Mahathir when he put his life on the line by insisting on doing his Heart Operation in our country. That is when it counts – you put your life on the line.

These contradictions, logical or otherwise, are forever swimming around in my head. To me we are all one people, one world. Nothing is right or wrong except for some universal truths which is impossible to argue against. The killing of an innocent child is one of them.

This is an exercise to be open to no one in particular - but to myself. I am putting into words what have been in my mind for many many years. I would have done it sooner but the intricacies of setting up a blog was one I could not master until recently. Yes I did not have the brains to do so – then again, that’s me

No comments:

Post a Comment