I just received a message from my niece in KL who said that her Mother, after three years of Parkinson’s, has taken a turn for the worst – drifting in and out of the reality she is in – into her past and and having conversation with love ones long gone. This mother of hers is one of those people that are dear to my heart because many happy memories of my childhood in Kampong Kassipilay in Sentul at my grandfather’s house had her in it. It was just all those wonderful memories that will not go away with time. Its recall would bring smiles to my face and a heaviness in my heart because those times are past. Good memories should always bring good thoughts but these that I have of her do bring in a certain sadness because for the last twenty years or so I have only been able to see her maybe at most, once a year over Hari Raya. And now not even once a year over Hari Raya because I am now in Adelaide. So I tell my neice the only thing I can. Be there for your mother if she should need you in her moment of clarity.
I think often of my beloved daughter, her husband and their Izzy - almost every moment of the day. Almost every moment of the day. Sometimes the missing of them becomes unbearable. But as I told my niece, such is life. It is hard being away from those that you really love but having my son and wife near me helps. I hug my son almost everyday – and he is almost thirty years old. To see him everyday is a joy and brings me much happiness. For my wife and me anybody that makes our children happy makes us happy to – so we love these people as much as our children love them.
What is hard to understand sometimes is that the people that should love you most are the very people that hurts you most. Why this happens I know not but my wife and me are resolved that it will not be so with our children and those that they love.
Last week I was walking down the street when a man stopped me and asked if I could spare two dollars. I brushed him aside as I normally do when confronted with situations like that. Then as I watched him walk away a sadness striked me. I asked myself what would drive a man to ask someone else for two dollars? Maybe he needed the bus fare to go home, something to eat …what would it do to me to give him the two dollars? I only had a fifty dollar note. I dashed into the shop nearby – got some change and gave him five dollars when I caught up with him. As I walked away a thought just hit me….maybe he wanted the money to wager on a horse….and I told myself “Hussein think good of others so that they may think good of you too”. Amen.